Hey there, beautiful people (and the me who’s reading this):
Whew, these last few months? Totally different vibe. I mean, it’s been ages since I put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard) and actually hit “publish.” There were days—weeks, even—where I’d open my drafts, stare at a blank screen, and then promptly close the tab like, Nope. Zero words, zero motivation, zero posts. So, if I missed saying “Happy New Year,” take this for 2024 and 2025, okay? You’re welcome.
To the Me Who Couldn’t Write
The me who felt less than, got overwhelmed, cried, maybe even scrammed (yes, scrammed!) in frustration, and genuinely believed I might never write again—welcome back, hunnay! That phase is over, and I’m so glad you made it through. New dispensation unlocked!
Dear Life Phases,
I have learnt a lot from you, and frankly, I’m still learning:
The Student Phase
Now, this one was a real love-hate situation. I felt more alone than I ever thought I could—only me daughter, only me student, only me my personal chef, cleaner, and entertainer; at some point I was even became my own hairdresser. Apparently, independence is both a blessing and a burn. But guess what? It taught me resilience, because who was going to give up? Not me. Too much was at stake. Honestly, you’d think that would draw me closer to God—and sure, it did, but also kinda didn’t. I got complacent, focusing on just graduate, just graduate. And graduate I did!
The Job Hunt Phase
Whew, talk about trial by fire. I applied for everything. I cried, I fretted, I wept (sometimes all in one day). Real talk: I felt like I’d never be good enough, no matter how many prayers I said or tears I shed. I was basically a broken compass in the hands of someone who also had no idea where the road was. But then, right when I was at the end of my rope, God showed up like the Jagaban Promise Keeper He is. I still feel like I’m partly in this phase (in a new light, at least). Sometimes anxiety tries me, but my faith stays chilling—like lying on the beach and seeing huge waves crash offshore. Yeah, they’re there, but they can’t knock me down on the sand. I’m not in the storm; I’m just enjoying the cool breeze.
The Waiting Phase
Ah, yes. The one that still has me scratching my head. I keep asking, “What exactly am I waiting for?” I know waiting is important, but abeg, it’s hard to remain calm. Meanwhile, everyone’s hurling big questions my way. “When will you marry?” That one I can at least answer: “On my wedding day, obviously.” But ask me about my career path or long-term dreams, and I’m torn between “It’s a secret” and “I genuinely don’t know.”
Through It All
In every single one of these phases, God has been my constant. I cried, ranted, danced, and raged, and somehow, He kept holding my hand—even on my weakest days. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt, it’s that sometimes you don’t see the bigger picture until you’re out of the tough spot. And that’s okay. We grow, we learn, we move.
So here’s to new seasons, fresh starts, and plenty more cheeky, honest ramblings from me—because I’m officially back, and I’ve got a lot to say.
With gratitude,
The Erin who finally found her words again
Bible Verse:
“But the Lord said to me, “My grace is enough for you. When you are weak, then my power is made perfect in you.” So I am very happy to brag about my weaknesses. Then Christ’s power can live in me.”
2 Corinthians 12:9 ICB (International Children’s Bible; because I’m a child)
Song Recommendation:
“You Say” by Lauren Daigle
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